Friday, February 23, 2007

Rumble in my mailbox

Sometimes, I marvel that my mailbox doesn't explode due to what occasionally arrives on the same day. Case in point, what happened last Tuesday. A complementary copy of Ministry & Liturgy (nee Modern Liturgy) magazine showed up. (You know it has to be crap with titles like that.) Now I would rather belt sand my face off than subscribe to this crap. Imagine every goofy liturgical idea and pictures of ugly churches, vessels, and vestments all in one place. Add to this the fact that THE ICE QUEEN (plain clothes nun instructor for pastoral liturgy) from the seminary liked it. But this wasn't the only periodical to show up. Also arriving were The National Catholic Register, The Wanderer, and The American Rifleman. I have the image of these three fine magazines cornering M&L in the mailbox and giving it a turbo atomic wedgie.

Ministry & Liturgy story: I give nicknames to ugly churches. The LA Cathedral is either the Southern California Abomination or the Yellow Armadillo. One church in Salt Lake used to be called Our Lady of the Jacuzzi, until the ugly submersion font was removed by a friend of mine. I call another church, Our Lady of Star Trek. No kidding, it used to look like a set from one of the early, 'Care Bear' seasons of Star Trek: The Next Generation. (It has since been improved by a new pastor who among other improvements installed pews and removed the 'Leaking Lamb Font'. It looked like the lamb needed Depends.) This church was featured once featured on the cover of then Modern Liturgy magazine. This prompted someone to call our then diocesan liturgical director and ask, "Who do you have to sleep with to get your church on the cover of Modern Liturgy?"
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