Tuesday, January 30, 2007

What the Caveman is really doing

The Orthometer's favorite Papist from the Neolithic Era hasn't been posting much for the last couple of weeks. The official claim is that it is due to a life-threatening illness averted by prayer and some slick surgery which ruined CC's career as a male model.

I don't buy this story for a minute. It is a cover from some top secret ecclesiastical black ops. No one knows for certain what this retired drill sergeant is up to. Could it be training the Vatican's new Liturgical Rescue Team? (A crack force of clerical commandos with a mission to enforce rubrics and eliminate felt and burlap.) Could it be preparation for a role as a deep cover mole at the Anaheim Religious Education Conference? (Even now the Caveman could be undergoing intensive training in liturgical dance.) My personal bet is that he is part of an episcopal re-education team. (Wrong thinking bishops are given the opportunity for a little 'vacation' --no sleep, EWTN, and John Wayne movies.) The sad thing is that we will likely never know the truth!

(Seriously, say a prayer for the Caveman's recovery and that the slacker will get off his duff and blog.)
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